My weight loss journey
Some of you may know that I lost 95 pounds about 4 years ago. I had my weight loss journey journaled on my website, which brilliant me, lost when my site crashed.
Also, brilliant as a I am, I've allowed myself to regain 30 pounds. Yikes! That's still 65 pounds less than I started out, but oh my god, it's so easy to regain. Just blink and voila! You can be four sizes larger.
I had been pushing a size 22 and then got down to a size 6. Now I'm back up to a 12.
Obviously, I got way too smug. At first I blamed Hurricane Wilma. Hurricane stress is a great thing to blame bad eating habits on. Of course, after Wilma struck and our power was out for weeks, all the Chinese restaurants managed to stay open, and a goodly number of pizza places, so that it was so much easier and a whole lot more comforting to eat Chinese takeout and pizza than eating out of tin cans and grilling chicken - every day. Of course Pollo Tropical was one of the first places to reopen, too, and I LOVE fried plantains, so when we got off work early daily, I swung by Pollo Tropical almost every evening.
Okay, so I'm TERRIBLE!
I got hold of myself to a point after that. We put our then 11 year old into taekwondo for behavior modification and when they told us that three other family members could take class also for the same price, my daughters and I joined. It's great exercise and I'm now a blue belt, just four belts away from becoming a black belt.
But ya know what? Even if you exercise a lot and eat wrong, you gain weight. Especially on the days you can't exercise as usual.
I love taekwondo (tkw from now on for short). Oh yeah, I love it when my son pukes on the floor after too much exertion and the instructor blames me that he threw up - like excuse me, how could I make him throw up or why would I want him to? Or when my lungs feel like they're about to explode after 100 jumping jacks. Or when my wrists feel like every bone is breaking every time my partner kicks the board I'm holding for her. Or when my instructor yells, "The other right foot, Mrs. Hopper!" (Yeah, I'm blond sometimes). My ultimate favorite (well, second only to my son puking all over the mat and yours truly having to clean it up) is when my daughters kick me (HARD) in the back during sparring. Oh yeah, I LOVE tkd! Surprisingly, after my lungs recover and my asthma attack dissipates, I really do feel better, more nimble, and younger. Amazing!
I've also rejoined Weight Watchers, but it's a lot more difficult the second time around. I feel less motivated. Size 12 doesn't seem as bad as size 20 or 22. Okay, so I'd rather be a size 8, or 10. Mainly, I don't want to keep going up up and away! It's soooooo easy to gain. But when the hunger monster strikes at night (I'm a nighttime eater), I'm such a powder puff.
Today, my 16 year old and I went to the gym and I walked 3 miles on the treadmill and biked 8 miles, burning about 400 calories. Pretty darn good! I'm proud of myself. I would have biked at least 2 more miles and I really wanted to stay another hour working out if Missy wouldn't have been glaring at me, her way of saying "I'm borrrrrrred, Mommy!" (she gets bored sooooooooooooo easily)
So I'm publicly flagellating myself and vowing that I will lose at least 20 pounds (and keep them off) from this point, even if I have to walk an hour nightly after tkd, AND snack on apples and fruit. I was told that I was too skinny and drawn when I had reached the 95 pound mark.
If it's not obvious, I will state that my main concern is to be healthy and stay young and agile for as long as possible. I never want to go back to feeling 70 years old again, even when I'm 70.
I will journal my weight loss battle here.
Before, it was so easy to lose. I was so ANAL, so driven, that the pounds seemed to melt off. So this time, I fear, it will be a lot tougher, a lot more like the average weight loss warrior.
Anyone with me?